It's an extrovert's world out there. Or is it?
Watching my son prep for college has taught me that it’s an extrovert’s world out there. It’s easy to initially feel bad about yourself when there seems to be a lot of empty white space where all of your high school extracurriculars and volunteer work should go. I’ve learned the worst thing you can do is watch YouTubers or read blogs from extroverted college-bound seniors about how to get into your dream school. When reading through a recent college scholarship application, the amount of pressure I felt (and I’m not even the one applying) to be everything and anything was overwhelming and honestly soul-crushing. But that’s when I took a step back and realized what I was doing. I was comparing my own son to others. Which, introvert or extrovert, an application filled to the brim or sparse, is the worst thing anyone can do. I reminded myself to celebrate who Tommy IS in real life. Not on paper (although that’s worthy of celebration too). And we both decided that particular scholarship wasn’t the one for him and put it aside. I read somewhere not to change who you are to attempt to get into a specific college. Instead, BE who you are, and the right college will accept you. And that’s what you want, right? You want to find the college where you’ll fit in the best, no matter it’s ranking in US News & World Report. If you find the college that’s a good fit for you, it makes it a number one ranking in my book. All that to say, the things I want to share about Tommy aren’t necessarily tangible.
“ You want to find the college where you’ll fit in the best, no matter it’s ranking in US News & World Report. If you find the college that’s a good fit for you, it makes it a number one ranking in my book.”
Tommy is an introvert, yes, but he’s also chill, witty, confident, independent, and sensitive. His creativity inspires me. It’s a creativity that comes through in his writings, whether it’s his thoughts and opinions about a film that interests him or a piece of fiction. Each story holds meaning. I'm struck with the diversity of this young man; whereas he can be quiet and sensitive, he can also let out a witty one-liner to make everyone laugh at just the right moment. His sense of adventure, like hiking 30+ miles into the wilderness for a week with his dad without the comforts of modern civilization, and at the same time being cool snuggled up with a good book, watching a movie, or being immersed in managing a basketball team on NBA 2k20. He’s independent and not a fan of following the crowd if it’s not what he wants to do. His security in who he is (he can teach me a few lessons about that) gives him the confidence to sit down or stand up when warranted. And while mostly quiet, if you push a button about something he feels passionate about, you’re likely to hear his viewpoint. He’s logical yet compassionate. So when he stands up for something he believes strongly about, he’s also able to listen to the other side. He finds connections in random things. He’s a problem solver and a deep thinker. He’s good at computer science but is more inspired by critiquing a film he discovered. I think this makes him a well-rounded individual and just who he needs to be.
Comments